I spent all last week in a cabin in the woods stuck using someone else’s Macbook Pro. I have never been a Mac user. I know some of the differences in the OS, but I’ve never learned how to really use one. I have sported a PC since I was 10.

Having to suddenly switch from PC to Mac for a week is probably like being thrown into a country where no one speaks English. It’s really hard to discipline yourself to learn another language if you can just go back to English whenever you need, but if you are immersed in it you will find that you are much more capable of picking it up than you once thought.

It’s the same with learning to use a Mac. In the past, when I got frustrated trying to complete a task, I just went and did it on my super-beefy Dell XPS gen 2 (don’t laugh, I know it’s 5 1/2 years old). Then I’d knife a few counter-terrorists as a victory celebration.

Last week I didn’t have that option, so I was literally forced to learn the basics of OSX or Puma or Liger or Bumblebee or whatever operating system Apple just released. Yes it was frustrating at times, but that frustration forced me to figure things out. And once I started to figure things out, I … liked it.

Know why? Because stuff JUST WORKED. I’m serious, the computer would never just hang up on me. It always told me what was happening. All the programs worked together, blissfully unaware that they were drinking from the same memory pool and using the same resources that 10 others were. And I was on a dial-up connection to boot.

At this point, 3 out of the 3 total people reading this article are hovering their mouses over the “close tab” button in their browsers. I don’t blame you. I wouldn’t even read an article with this title, so that was your first mistake.

You know what doesn’t JUST WORK? My PC. I tried backing up my music from my laptop to my external HD to my desktop, and when I pasted the My Music folder into the “Brian\Users\” folder in Vista, it made a duplicate folder instead of copying over the old one. Only then did I realize I wasn’t looking at an actual directory structure even though I was using Windows Explorer.

I know, right. WTF? I had to give up because it wouldn’t let me rename the folders because I didn’t have admin permission even though I am the sole proprietor of my own computer (i.e. I am an admin dangit).

I’m not saying a Mac doesn’t crash - the Mac I was using did crash once. I’m not saying Macs are good for everyone - some people like to play games, and if they have a Mac they’re obviously limiting themselves. And I’m not saying you will like a Mac when you use it. Some people just don’t appreciate user interface. These are usually the same people that have messy houses, disorganized sock drawers, and 5 year-old wardrobes.

Not that there’s anything wrong with that.

Do you see where I’m going with this? Mac is more of an accessory and tool for your lifestyle, and PC is more of an accessory and tool for your work life. That is exactly what Mac has been telling me for the past 5 years, I just haven’t been listening.

When I got home from my week of slim, sleek, bright, colorful, gay Mac using and fired up Vista on the old Dell XPS frag-box beast of a mainframe, I found myself having much less fun and much more frustration*. Is using a computer supposed to be fun? Here’s my quick answer: yes, if you’re using it at home. And yes, even if you’re using it at work, but sadly this is just not possible when you are a Microsoft web developer.

In summary, I want to point out that while dealing with media files on an OS I had only used for a week, I was able to get tasks done much more quickly with fewer errors than I was able to get done with the exact same media files on an OS I had used my whole life. I don’t care what facts and figures you throw at me, that right there is proof that Macs are not all bad.

If you have the money and you don’t care about ever ever evAR customizing anything on your computer, a Mac is for you. Finally, please don’t tell me you don’t buy into the whole “lifestyle” thing. Consumer electronics are all about lifestyle. This isn’t 1986 anymore.

*Note in this context the word “gay” purely references style, not sexual preference. I like small words, not big words.

We’ve all been watching for a few years while Mac bashes PC on the (sometimes) funny TV spots. I enjoy them. They’re better than local car dealership commercials, but not quite as funny as the referee training Bud Light commercial.

However, I think PC users are just starting to realize that Apple actually thinks it makes a better product. If that is the case, we either live in a communistic society or everyone is stupid, because it would seem like better products would make up a majority of the market share. That’s beside the point of this post.

I think PC users are starting to get annoyed by the Mac vs PC commercials because I’m beginning to see quite a few hilarious Mac bashing pics/videos in retaliation. If I had to explain it, I would put it this way: PC is the Death Star and Mac is the X-Wing bomber that misses the ventilation shaft. It doesn’t threaten PC, but PC’s gonna blow up all Mac’s planets in retaliation for messing with them (nevermind that the Death Star loses in the end, dangit).

OK, dumb allegory. Anyway, I picked out my top three favorite Mac bashing images for your enjoyment. This is all in fun, as I am not a Mac basher myself. I believe there is a time and place to use a PC just as there is a time and place to use a Mac. That doesn’t mean these aren’t funny.

The Commodore 64 vs Macbook Air

I saw this one on Digg a while back and now it’s pinned up to my cork board at my desk.

Shut Up

This is what we think about that cocky kid constantly bashing PC for having a glitchy operating system and tons of viruses. We all know Macs don’t have as many viruses because the more successful company with the larger market share is obviously going to be the target of a perpetrator whose primary goal is to infect the largest number of computers possible. And if you think Mac’s OS never glitches, think again.

Gay Test

Found this on Bandy Humor’s page of demotivational images, which is NSFW by the way and has a lot of trashy stuff mixed in with the funny stuff. If you want to see a bunch of safe for work demotivational posters, I recommend this page at Despair, Inc. This is one of my favorite images so far. I could never put my finger on what was wrong with this image until it was put into this demotivational template and given the subtext. Come to think of it, it’s entirely true. I’m a man - I want to tinker with stuff. I want to piece together my home theater system, take apart my car, and for goodness sake, you better let me customize my computer. (Note: the image itself is taken directly from an actual Mac advertisement)

It’s Friday. Let’s step out of the void/cephalopod/abyss kick we’ve been on and feast our eyes upon this absolutely spectacular piece of technology. In my opinion, this is the culmination of the entire human race. When God created us He only did it for two reasons: 1) so we would worship Him, and 2) so we would figure out how to build this R2-D2 projector. I’m sorry if that was blasphemous. Just click on this link please:

R2-D2 projector in action video (over at Gizmodo)

Here are some photos from the Star Wars Shop:

In case your IT department blocks the clicking of links on the intertubez, here is a list of features. Bear in mind all of these features are controlled via a Millennium Falcon remote control:

• DVD/CD player projector
• Completely motorized (like a remote control car)
• 260″ projection size
• Multipositioning (project on the wall, ceiling, floor, etc.)
• 1800:1 contrast ratio
• Connects to Xbox 360, PS3, and Wii
• Optical digital out for Dolby 5.1 surround
• Build in virtual surround
• All original R2-D2 sounds!!! This is the main reason I want it.
• S-video in (connects to camcorder)
• USB slots and multi-card reader (display photos on the wall)
• iPod doc (plays music and displays photos and video from your iPod)

Oh BTW it costs three grand. WORTH IT!

There’s this new technology called Silverlight from Microsoft, which basically exists to support fast, cost-effective delivery of high-quality video to all major browsers. When I installed it in my browser, IE at the time, nothing happened. I was supposed to be seeing this shiny, spinning carousel of Microsoft downloads seen over there →.

I tried installing it within IE7 but nothing happened. I tried again - still nothing. Then I opened Firefox, and let me tell you I had it installed in no time. Basically a browser restart was required, but only Firefox was kind enough to let me know what was going on.

That is not the most troubling part, however. At least it still worked in IE - that is, after I restarted the browser. The reason I was even at this website was to install a program called Visual Web Developer 2008, which is a Microsoft product. I tried to download and install it (this is after I’ve restarted my IE browser and everything’s kosher, mind you) and I only got as far as the screen shows down there ↓.

I thought to myself, maybe it just needs another restart. Nope, it just goes in circles and never installs it. So I switch back to my friend Firefox again and try the same method. Once again it let me know exactly what was going on the whole time. “Do you want to save the file?”. Sure. “Here it is downloaded to your computer. Do you want to open this file?” Yes I do. “Ok, look, now it’s installing. Anything else is your OS’s fault. I’m going back to the Intarwebz, see you in a bit.” Ok buddy, ttyl.

Bottom line is, IE7 was not capable of downloading a simple file from Microsoft’s download page, but Firefox did it painlessly. I’m not just complaining about the evil corporation Microsoft for no reason like a lot of people out there. If you know me, you know I have nothing against them and the majority of products I use on a day to day basis were made by them. But this was truly frustrating and I wanted to vent about it before my anger subsided.

Stop me if you’ve heard this one before: two priests and a rabbi walk into a bar, and my hard drive crashes and I lose my entire music library.

That means I lost not only the purchased music for which I do not own physical backups (e.g. iTunes downloads, CDs I’ve lost, CDs I’ve illegally borrowed and ripped - whoops, scratch that last one), but I’ve lost the countless hours it took to rip my entire music collection into Windows Media Player and then convert into my iTunes library. It’s like recording yourself knocking down an amazing array of dominoes and forgetting to turn the video camera on, twice.

Don’t cry for me blogosphina, because I keep my music library on my work PC as well, which means all I had to do was purchase a mobile hard drive to tote my songs home with me. For our current purposes, let’s assume you do not have a redundant music library or $130 to spend on this stylish red flask hard drive. Mmmm, whisky sectors.

So, here’s where you stand: you have 5 gazillion [legal] songs on your hard drive and you want them to be safe, like mine. That’s where MP3tunes.com comes in. It is a free, unlimited storage locker for your songs. After you create your account you can download a handy application that syncs your local library with your online library. What this means is you can upload all of your songs at work (took me about a day and a half to upload 4300 tracks), listen to them online from any computer, and then download them when you get home. Presto! Now you have identical music libraries on all of your workstations.

The software is smart enough to do it all automatically, so you don’t have to worry about uploading/downloading anything manually - although you have that option. During syncs it hogs your system resources, but you can just pause it if you need a boost. You can also run it over night or during the weekend if you don’t want to deal with it.

I’m no longer afraid to buy that next computer, because I know I won’t have to spend 2 weeks of my life re-ripping all those live Pearl Jam albums. Did you ever notice they have more live albums than regular albums? It’s ridiculous.