Today my wife and I went to Subway for lunch. The total cost of our meal was $13.37. If I had an iPhone like all you pie-in-the-sky gizmo-geeks out there, I could’ve taken a picture to prove it. You’ll just have to take my word for it.
This is 100% funny if you play WoW, and 0% funny if you don’t. OK maybe 1%.
10. You registered for an Agro-Science class because you thought it would help your warrior tank better.
9. You get on vent every day, and it’s not because you’re cold.
8. Your son’s first word was “LF PORT TO SHATT, PAYING 5g - PST!!!”
7. You frequently joke that your headphones give you plus 24 intellect.
6. You got a speeding ticket and told your wife the cop was a spawn camper.
5. You want twin daughters so you can name them Mara and Kara.
4. Your favorite color is purple and you’re straight.
3. Your least favorite day of the whole week isn’t Monday. It’s Tuesday.
2. A guy cut you off in traffic and you glanced down at your dashboard to see what level he was.
Number 1 is R-rated, so don’t read it if you are sensitive to sexual innuendo. Too bad though, cause it’s really funny.
It’s down there ↓
1. You mount your Netherdrake more often than you mount your wife.
You don’t see westerns too often these days. The last good western I saw was Tombstone, and each time I re-watch it on TV (pretty much once a week), I realize how fast it’s climbing up the ranks of my favorite re-watchable films of all time.
Naturally, every western I see is/will be compared to Tombstone, especially since there are so few of them. 3:10 To Yuma was not Tombstone, and it wasn’t trying to be. It was on a much smaller scale and it focused on a few key characters as they made their way to catch a train. It was well done, and I enjoyed watching it, but how much can you ultimately accomplish, film-wise, with such a simple plot? I think 3:10 accomplished all it could have, especially in the relationship between the main protagonist and antagonist Christian Bale and Russel Crowe, respectively. This relationship is why I liked the movie.
Hats off to the casting director for choosing the perfect actors to fit the main rolls. Bale is great as the reserved, meek, former military sharp shooter who has hidden talents that we don’t really get to see until the end of the film. Crowe aptly plays the smooth talking criminal who is deranged but still has some good in him deep down. I also really enjoyed the performance of Ben Foster (remember Angel from the 3rd X-Men?) as Charlie Prince. He played a western villain so well that it’s up there with some of the performances from Tombstone. I’m sorry that’s the only western I reference, but that and The Quick and The Dead are the only westerns I’ve ever seen. BTW, LOL @ The Quick and The Dead. It sucked immensely, but it’s worth watching for the all star cast.
As mentioned, the heart and soul of this movie is the relationship between Dan Evans (Bale) and Ben Wade (Crowe). There is great dialogue, a lot of tense scenes, and a redemption story. It’s no Darth Vader redemption story, but really what can match that?
It just didn’t have enough “stuff” in it. That’s the only way I can describe it. It was s single-track plot about getting to a train. That’s it. I didn’t really get into the relationship between Dan Evans and his son. There really weren’t any other relationships to speak of besides that of the main two characters.
I didn’t like how long the ending was. It seemed dragged out. There were things said that I thought had already been said, and I also thought the entire last 20 minutes of the movie were completely unrealistic.
Acting - no beratings
Plot - 1 berating
Inconsistencies - no beratings
Unbelievable Events - 2 beratings
Schematics - no beratings
0/10 Stand in line for the very first showing
1/10 See it the first weekend
2/10 See it at full price
>> 3/10 See it at the Five-Buck-Club
4/10 See it at the dollar-fifty
5/10 See it OnDemand
6/10 Rent it from Blockbuster
7/10 Watch it on TV
8/10 Watch it purely for spousal points
9/10 Never watch it
10/10 Buy it and publicly destroy it
Ironman because it’s Robert Downey Jr. so even if the movie sucks he will not I guarantee it.
Prince Caspian because it looks way better than The Lion, The Witch, & The Wardrobe.
Indiana Jones 4 because Spielburg, Lucas, and Ford create the perfect trifecta.
The Hobbit (both films) because imagine Lord of the Rings directed by the guy who directed Pan’s Labyrinth.
Speed Racer because the Wackowski Bros. are bringing us another prototype, state-of-the-art method of filming called Full Focus, just like Bullet Time from the Matrix series.
The Dark Knight because Heath Ledger looks amazing as the Joker.
The Happening because I love end-of-the-world type movies.
G.I. Joe because it’s directed by the director of The Mummy and it has Ray Park (Darth Maul) as Snake Eyes.
Halo because Peter Jackson’s name keeps popping up.
Old School Dos because the same cast is back.
Terminator Salvation: The Future Begins because John Connor will be played by Christian Bale and look what he did for the Batman franchise.
Inglorious Bastards because it’s Quentin Terantino and he claims this is his best script yet.
24 because Jack Bauer will finally be able to say f*ck.
Spider Man 4 because I can’t get enough of this franchise and I like to torture myself
Cloverfield 2 because I would love to see the same events from the vantage point of a different camera.
Half-Life because I write letters to Santa every night asking for a Half Life movie.
Dan In Real Life wasn’t the film I was expecting. I was expecting Stranger Than Fiction and I got The Family Stone mixed with Little Miss Sunshine. Although somewhat thrown off at first, I came to realize I liked it because it was nowhere near as excruciatingly frustrating as The Family Stone or awkward as Little Miss Sunshine.
I thought it would be about Dan and his personal life, including relationships with women, hobbies, and short-comings, sort of like Stranger Than Fiction. Instead, it was about his family life. Overall, I enjoyed watching this film.
Steve Carrell does a good job in this movie. He is calm and collected and sort of troubled with how his life is going, but nowhere near as troubled as Nicolas Cage’s character in The Weatherman (an excellent film). It is very real, albeit very frustrating, how he interacts with his daughters. Let’s put it this way, I would never want to be a single father raising three teenage-ish daughters.
I don’t think this movie is about his relationship with his daughters, however, even though most people would say so. I think it’s about his relationship with his family (i.e. parents and siblings). His daughters are a secondary motif. This film is him against the world, similar to Steve Martin’s role in Father of the Bride. It seems Dan’s family is out to get him, as well as the local law enforcement and pretty much any external force present in the movie.
He needs to figure out if he’s going to give in or stay strong. Steve Carrell does a good job playing a man who is struggling to figure out what he’s supposed to do, and how he’s supposed to be a brother, son, and father.
The scene where his brother is playing piano and they’re all singing along about the pig-nose girl is hilarious and feel-good. Also, the movie has a semi-good indie music soundtrack (which I totally expected).
The cast includes Steve Carrell and Dane Cook. Shouldn’t this have been a comedy? Or at least funny? I know, I was surprised too. I think I laughed once. It was the scene with the piano.
Someone screwed up the plot on this one. It’s not the actors’ fault, the director’s fault, or the composer’s fault. It’s the producers’ fault. Unlike Father of the Bride where Steve Martin was the one who needed to give in and stop being the idiot (although I could definitely relate to him and was rooting for him to stay strong), Dan In Real Life should have featured the main character staying strong and not giving in. That’s what a single father of three daughters needs to do, especially when his children have had to go through the passing away of their mother.
When Dan proceeds to apologize to everyone and completely give in and become broken and vulnerable, I cringed. He lost all credibility when he did that, and he lost it to people that needed to leave him the hell alone and treat him like an adult. You should not have to apologize to your kids for being a good father.
Some will think that he was not being a good father in this film - that he was neglecting his children in his pursuit of the woman he had fallen in love with. I would contest that argument by saying that he was looking out for his kids’ best interest by following his heart, which was leading him to an amazing woman that could (and does) end up becoming their new mother.
Acting - 2 beratings
The actress portraying the leading love interest was not good, nor were the actors that played his parents. Plus, two of the funniest people I know were not funny at all in this film. It’s hard to dock a movie points for that, but I’m kind of tired of hilarious actors playing serious roles, aren’t you? Dane Cook was funnier in Mr. Brooks than he was in Dan In Real Life.
Plot - 2 beratings
Wasn’t what I thought it would be, and ended up frustrating me at the end. Didn’t make sense to me or have an obvious edifying or uplifting message. Sure it had a happy ending, but I didn’t like how we got to it.
Inconsistencies - no beratings
Unbelievable Events - 1 berating
I don’t believe that Dan would have apologized and admitted defeat and failure like he did at the end. At least, I don’t want to believe he would do that.
Schematics - no beratings
0/10 Stand in line for the very first showing
1/10 See it the first weekend
2/10 See it at full price
3/10 See it at the Five-Buck-Club
4/10 See it at the dollar-fifty
>> 5/10 See it OnDemand
6/10 Rent it from Blockbuster
7/10 Watch it on TV
8/10 Watch it purely for spousal points
9/10 Never watch it
10/10 Buy it and publicly destroy it
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Phil: I am rather fond of the “With or Without You” Graph. Clever… Congrats on the posting of your... Chris: Sweet, I’ll check it out. Chris: No. 
Is it good?
